Fangirling Chinese Novels

Stewed Squid with Honey (蜜汁炖鱿鱼) — Chapter 3



Regular update during Peanuts’ normal posting time-ish.

Second time for Tong Nian attempting to meet a guy in a video game. Will it be more successful than the first?

Chapter 3 – Pro Gamer?

The entire night, she was immersed in her own feelings of gloom, and the atmosphere in the room was so stiflingly depressing it was scary. The scariest part was, she later sent more invitations to grunt, but he did not accept them… Didn’t accept them… Didn’t accept them…

In this way, she tossed and turned in bed until three in the morning, when she finally could not take it anymore and, in the dark, sat up straight.

It must have been a problem with her character selection.

That character was too ugly!

That must be it.

So, she furtively opened up her computer. To prevent her parents from seeing the light in her bedroom, she pulled the blanket off the bed and, propping it up with the monitor, made a little tent, which she slipped into. Speedily, she turned on the computer, clicked on the desktop shortcut, and entered the game… Hmm? Where was the password for the account? She dug around again on her desk for a lengthy time, and finally, pulling it out from beneath one of the keyboards, she carefully input it.

A few hours ago, she had persistently sent seven or eight invitations over… and they had all been flat out rejected. Now…

Even though she was feeling rather timid, she still, one letter at a time, typed in grunt’s name.

And then, the enter key!

He was online?!

He wasn’t sleeping? So hard-working?

No wonder Soy Milk said his account was in the Grandmaster group of players… Uh, what was the Grandmaster group? … She had forgotten to ask.

Anyway, when she heard, “grandmaster,” she would think of the saying, “a grandmaster of an era[1].” Really cool and flashy, so it must be right.


Poor her. She did not even really have any concept of what this particular game was about, but she had already learned proficiently how to invite someone to do battle. T.T


He didn’t immediately turn it down?

All of a sudden, a dialogue box popped up:

grunt has accepted your invitation. Please wait patiently while the system randomly selects 8 players.

He! Accepted! It!

Wait! She immediately sent over a private message: May I… be on the same team as you? Let’s not be enemies, k?

There was no reply.


The system began to read the data and then entered into the character selection screen. This time, she did not dare just arbitrarily choose one, and in those more than one hundred characters, she carefully searched to see if there was a lovely and adorable character whom, the instant you saw her, you could not bear to kill her. Soon, she found a Loli-style [Lolita style][2] character who was even riding… a big cat?

A cutie, and so adorable. She’s the one!

With the sound of lightning flashing past, the image on the screen completely opened up. She swiftly swept her gaze over all the IDs that were before her eyes. grunt was there! His character was different from last night’s. This time, the character he selected was… um, an evil demon. Even cooler and more attractive!

She wordlessly shifted a couple of steps closer to him. Seeing that he did not give any reaction, she shifted another two steps.

Finally, she decided to be bold and moved right up beside him.

Huh? He wasn’t avoiding her? So, that meant he wasn’t turned off by this? Hidden under the blanket, Tong Nian wiped away at the condensation from her breath that had coated the monitor, all the while wearing a silly grin on her face.


Before she had even gotten to experience that delight for more than a few seconds, everyone had already bought all their items and, one by one, were leaving home base. There were three lanes: top, mid, and bottom. grunt seemed not to even hesitate before going onto the middle lane and following it along.

Straightaway, Tong Nian exuberantly ran after him…


Mid lane, one player. Wasn’t that… accepted, common knowledge?

On the chat screen, her teammates one after another passed out.

Hey, the dude riding the big cat… ya crazy?

Sh*t! I ran into two hackers already this week. Don’t tell me this is another one?

It’s 3:00 in the morning. Hey hacker, don’t you sleep??!! My ranking, my points AAAAH!


Tong Nian was utterly bewildered. Astride her big cat, she stood behind grunt, not knowing what she did wrong this time.

Weren’t they all spawned in the same place? Weren’t they teammates? Why couldn’t she follow a teammate? Couldn’t they help each other out?

You… and I are teammates in the same group, right? Why can’t I follow you? She finally… summoned her courage to ask that person who was in front of her.

grunt: ……

He replied to me!! He really replied to me!

Tong Nian instantly forgot about these things that had baffled her, and riding on her big cat, she elatedly ran circles around him. Hihi, grunt! I’m Little Squidie. It’s my first time playing video games. Honest! Honest! I’m soooo excited! *covers my face* Don’t know what I should say. I’ll try my best to learn! Please, please don’t get frustrated with me!

grunt: ……

She had completely forgotten that she was toting around an account belonging to the Grandmaster group of this server…

Moreover, it was ranked 97th on the leaderboard for Mainland China…

Then, using this ID that was ranked 97th amongst all of the twenty-four servers and more than three million gamers in Mainland China, she bounded circles around grunt and asked: I use Q, W, E, R, and A, S, D, F to  attack, right? I read the walkthrough[3]  on the official website, and I played against the computer quite a few times to practice.


And so, three seconds later, a row of words appeared on the team-chat screen.

grunt: Not a hacker. ID stolen by one of the kids in the family. Everyone, watch yourselves.

Everybody fell over backwards.

This implied that, not only had they lost one person who could fight, they also needed to protect this ID and prevent him from being killed by the enemy. One kill meant that they were giving a hundred gold coins to the enemy, ah… Crap. They had no choice but to treat this guy like a Buddha whom they needed to reverentially worship.

Good thing this team still had grunt, a pro gamer who consistently ranked in the top ten on the leaderboard.


See the underbrush over there? grunt suddenly asked.

Yup! I see it really clearly! My monitor is especially good! Guaranteed it won’t lag!

grunt was silent.

After three seconds: Go inside it and stay there until the game is over.


* * * * *


grunt yawned and, turning himself over on the couch, blearily threw a glance at Gun, who had just turned off the computer. “Leader, can’t you just register and get an account of your own to play? Why are you always using mine to get your kicks?”

“What do you think?” Gun could not even be bothered to look up at him. “If I don’t help you win a few more times, you’ll soon fall out of the leaderboard’s top ten.”

This was obviously calling grunt’s capabilities into question.

“You really don’t want to sign-up for one yourself to play?” grunt had long since grown accustomed to this languid, nonconformist Leader with a wicked tongue and had acquired the ability to automatically filter out the sarcasm and taunting.

“Why? You really want me to register for one of my own?” Gun offhandedly shoved the keyboard in further on the computer desk and stood.

“I do, yeah. I still haven’t played a ranked match with Leader yet. I can’t really be happy about that.” grunt solemnly slipped on his rimless glasses and gave a stretch. Right as he was about to get up from the couch, a huge document folder came flying directly toward his face.

“If I register, then what’s the need for all of you? Go. Have them fill these all in, then give them to your captain to apply for visas.”


[1]一代宗师 “yi dai zong shi.” When a person has reached a very high achievement in a field, to the point that he can create his own school/sect and lead others if he so desires, he can be called a “grandmaster of an era.”

[2] “Loli” is referring to the term, Lolita, which originated in Japan and describes a subculture of Japan. Simplistically, the Lolita look is one that evokes images of a Victorian doll — ruffles on the dress, ribbons, bonnet, etc. Although in Japan, there are many variations (e.g. Gothic Loli, Sweet Loli, Princess Loli, etc), in general, it is striving for a cutesy, girlie, princessy look as opposed to sexy, mature, elegant, etc. In China, when people are talking about a “Loli,” it is not always that specific and usually refers simply to a young girl that is very cute or a style that evokes that feeling.

[3] As the name suggests, these are instructions for a game that walk you through a game’s story, describing how it is played and/or how to beat the game.

1 of 1 Prologue
3 of 49 Chapters
0 of 1 Epilogue

≪ Previous Chapter | Index | Next Chapter ≫

37 thoughts on “Stewed Squid with Honey (蜜汁炖鱿鱼) — Chapter 3

  1. Thank you Hoju for this new lovely novel 😉 I shall start catching up soon

  2. interesting that they are both using borrowed IDs to play with! And she’s just digging that terrible impression hole even deeper with her cutesy messages too lol. Thanks for the chapter!!

  3. Haha looks cute in this chapter, i wonder what makes them closer and how? It’s only 3 chapters lol…

    Thanks hoju!!!

  4. so skills TN obtained, capable to add friends to join a game

  5. i…. am having trouble not to dislike her. she’s not really having much redeeming qualities to her and i just can’t relate to someone so boy crazy and empty headed. i’m sorry, i will give it a few more chapters.

    • She’s not “deep” and philosophical, but you will learn that Tong Nian’s head is definitely not empty. Her EQ is quite low, though. LOL. This story is definitely not a Blazing Sunlight or Together Forever. It’s cutesy and fluffy and not meant to be taken seriously, so it may not be your thing.
      Thanks for reading. 😉

  6. I haven’t paid much attention to this novel because it involves online gaming and I am an idiot, but this is hilarious! Thank you for the chapters!

    • Understood. 🙂 We gaming idiots can hang out together in a corner and just enjoy the unfolding of a cute story.
      You’re so welcome!
      (P.S. Sorry for the late reply. The filter somehow sent you over into spam, and I’ve just been head down pushing out chapters that I forgot to check that little folder for quite some time. Problem fixed. 🙂 )

  7. lol she is so cute! I’m so happy that you’re picking this up cause i absolutely love this novel 🙂

    • And I love the contrast between her and Gun. The cutesy Loli vs. the aloof, silent “uncle.” I’m so glad you’re reading. 🙂

  8. Thanks Hoju for translating…

    I am on with any happy ending.. lol…

    Just a bit confuse..
    The male mc is gun.. not grunt.. right?
    Since i never play any on line game.. other than candy crush… I am a bit blurr… Hopefully i will catch up soon..

    • You’re welcome!

      The male lead is gun, the man she saw in the cybercafe. He is borrowing grunt’s account to play.
      I don’t play any online games at all… my biggest challenge for this translation.

  9. It was hard to like her. I mean i know she is a noob, but she really is too much. I thought she only has low EQ. I know this is supposed to be fluffy kind of thing, but i do feel for those gamer, i really hate it when ignorant kids joined (using borrowed accounts) and ruined important games. Do your homework and study dilligently before taking test girl 🙂
    But i do curious how she is going to redeem herself and catch the leader hohoho..

    • I don’t know how to commiserate since I don’t game, but you will find out that doing homework and studying diligently is definitely her strong point. :p
      How she redeems herself… hmm… A bit of fate, a bit of luck, a bit of being very genuine.

  10. I guess my confusion from the previous chapter is answered in this chapter. There are two people, Gun and Grunt. And the male lead, Gun, is indeed using somebody else’s ID which is owned by Grunt. Gosh, just these two names alone already give me a headache. 😂 Thank you for the translation though!

  11. ooh.. so gun and grunt are different people.. i finally get it =.=”
    as always thank you for the amazing chapter :3

  12. I like the story that based on mmorpg like wwyxhcq, sword art online.. and now this..
    Kinda miss the day when I could play mmorpg anytime tho.. but well, time flies and we hv to grow up and get to work somehow.. so this kind of story is really makes me smile..
    Thank you hoju.. xoxo

  13. Secondhand embarrassment is real!!! I feel so embarrassed for her *facepalm* She needs to at least know.the basics of the game lol! I also feel sorry for the person’s account she borrowed.

  14. . Thank you for your hard work. Found these translated novel because of the drama just one smile is very alluring

  15. Oh. Now, I get it. I was slightly confused why Gun and grunt are called separately lol.
    Many thanks, hoju~

  16. lol, I love the perfectly reasonable conclusion he came to 😉

  17. I cannot like TN in real life but she makes my stomach ache from laughing. hahaha

  18. Omaygad I can’t breathe! Hahhahahahah

    I’m suffering severely from 2nd hand embarrassment! Haha 😂

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