Fangirling Chinese Novels

My Darling (我的曼达林) — Epilogue and Author’s Afterword *NOVEL COMPLETED*


This is the end of My Darling! Woohoo! This final post contains the epilogue and author’s afterword, which are both only in the printed book (actually, there’s an editor’s afterword, too, but I didn’t include that), as well as some customary closing comments from me.  Thank you to everyone who has been reading along and especially those who dropped an encouraging little comment, even though I haven’t been around this last month to respond.

Ah, to be the son of a celebrity. The little guy is just adorable…




Chu Jian endured quite a bit of suffering during the birth of their baby. That evening, after a successful natural birth, she lay on the bed, her entire body drained of strength, and stared at the baby inside that transparent, plastic bassinet. In a quiet voice, she stated to Jian Bianlin, “He came out from me…”

For the entire day, Jian Bianlin’s heart had felt as if it was breaking, and only now was he somewhat in the mood to take a glance at that wrinkly little person. “Mm, he came out from you.”

“Bring him onto the bed for me to see.”

Bending over, Jian Bianlin picked up their baby into his arms, supported him securely, and then set him down beside Chu Jian.

Chu Jian felt even more that this was so amazing, and stroking her baby’s hand, she remarked, “Jian Bianlin, look. I really did birth a person out…”

“Mm… You birthed a person.”

This was just too amazing. It felt as if it was only yesterday that they were both sitting at that square table in the corner of the living room of Chu Jian’s old, dated home, each person occupying one side of the table as they did their homework, and in passing, she would copy a bit of his, too. And now, the next day, they had partnered up and birthed a person out…

© 2013-2016 FANATICAL ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Translated with the express permission of the author for If you are not reading this from, then this translation has been posted without the permission of the translator.


When their baby was two years old, Chu Jian and Jian Bianlin took him on a vacation for the first time. To prevent herself and their son from being photographed, Chu Jian brought the baby and went separately from Jian Bianlin. While going through the security checkpoint, Jian Bianlin, as usual, put his cap and sunglasses back on again after passing the screening officer. This brought about a flare up of exhilaration from the people waiting in the queues behind him and nearby. Cries of excitement sounded out incessantly. “Jian Bianlin!” “He’s so handsome in real life! So crazy handsome!” “My Baby Jian!” “Dammit! Where’s my mobile? Where is it?!” …

The baby did not understand at all any of what was being said. With the pitter-patter of his little steps, he scuttled from inside the door of the security checkpoint all the way over to Jian Bianlin. “Daddy, uppy!”

In that moment when everyone was still stunned, Chu Jian covered her head and face with a garment and darted over with swift strides, scooping up her son and enfolding him securely in her embrace. Then, like she was doing the 100-metre dash, she fled from there…

“Everyone, my apologies.” Jian Bianlin was extremely afraid that Chu Jian would blame him for causing their child to be exposed to the public eye, so very astutely, he chose to remove his cap and sunglasses. With a couple of very unnatural-sounding coughs and a rather solemn air, he unfastened the top two buttons of his button-up shirt. “Let’s just take pictures of me…”

© 2013-2016 FANATICAL ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Translated with the express permission of the author for If you are not reading this from, then this translation has been posted without the permission of the translator.


Chu Jian loved aquariums. With their little darling in her arms, she examined all the glass tanks one by one, reading the interpretive signs while teaching their son how to say the names of all the different kinds of fish. As Jian Bianlin followed along behind them, the only thing he did aside from taking photographs was to take more photographs—an endless number of photographs… At last, Chu Jian grew displeased, and turning to look at Jian Bianlin, she quietly chastised him, “Why aren’t you interacting with our baby? Boys should spend a bit more time with their fathers. It’s good for the physical and mental health of the little man.”

Restraining his love of taking photographs of Chu Jian, Jian Bianlin stepped closer to them. After gazing intently at the fish inside the glass tank for a long time, he informed their baby in a low tone, “That’s the daddy fish. That’s the mommy fish. That’s the baby fish.”

Huh? Chu Jian was taken aback. How can he tell?

Taking a couple of steps to the left, the extremely family-oriented Jian Bianlin very responsibly stated in a soft voice, “That’s the daddy lobster, and that’s the mommy lobster. And look, that one that’s a little smaller is the baby lobster.”

Chu Jian: “… Forget it. Just go take pictures…”

Men who were completely immersed in their happy married life and unable to transfer correct scientific knowledge were just too scary.

© 2013-2016 FANATICAL ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Translated with the express permission of the author for If you are not reading this from, then this translation has been posted without the permission of the translator.


When outside the home, Chu Jian liked to stroll through little stores and replenish groceries and other supplies, with the “strolling” part being her form of amusement.

So, into their shopping cart, Chu Jian would continually be tossing items: children’s cooling gel strips for fever relief, children’s cold medicine, children’s hand soap, children’s mosquito repellent bracelet, children’s…

And the things that Jian Bianlin also would nonstop place into the cart? Same.

Whatever Chu Jian took, he would add another one of the exact same item. At any rate, if she wanted to buy something, he could not go wrong in buying a bit more.

© 2013-2016 FANATICAL ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Translated with the express permission of the author for If you are not reading this from, then this translation has been posted without the permission of the translator.


One time before a vacation, Chu Jian was handed a long list that came from Jian Bianlin’s dad as well as her own parents and relatives. Written out on it was a series of items: rice cooker, mouthwash, sunscreen, shampoo massage brush, sponge used to scrub cupboards… Chu Jian was vexed from simply looking at that lengthy list, and it consisted completely of products that could be bought at the supermarket. Therefore, Chu Jian handed the mission over to Jian Bianlin, which he successfully completed.

But they overlooked one thing. These sorts of tourist destinations basically all had fellow Chinese who provided shopping guide services. They also overlooked the extent that Jian Bianlin’s face had pervaded into the general populace. As a result, that night, there was a live video on Instagram that revealed the sunscreen that Jian Bianlin most loves to use, the cupboard sponge that Jian Bianlin purposely went to purchase, the shampoo brush that Jian Bianlin highly recommends, the mouthwash that Jian Bianlin loves, the powdered milk that Jian Bianlin’s dearest had and then did not ever want to put down again…

© 2013-2016 FANATICAL ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Translated with the express permission of the author for If you are not reading this from, then this translation has been posted without the permission of the translator.


There was a period when their baby was especially attached to his daddy. Every night after going to sleep, he would every so often wake up and crawl out from the crib and onto the big bed to look for Daddy. Because of this, there were practically two weeks where Jian Bianlin did not have the opportunity to so much as even touch Chu Jian’s finger. Today, after waiting until the baby had finally fallen asleep, Jian Bianlin made every minute and second count. Dashing into the bathroom, he rinsed out his mouth in just a few seconds with mouthwash, squeezed out some soap, and washed his hands. Then, turning the already-asleep Chu Jian over, he bent down and covered her with his body.

His control had been nonexistent to begin with. And then, he heard Chu Jian, her arms entwined around his neck, mumble, “Don’t bother taking anything off… Let’s just do it.”

His heart gave a dull thud in his chest. Chu Jian was completely unaware of just how seductive her words were. But before they could even do anything, the crib began to rock again, and the baby sat up inside, gazing with wide, innocent eyes at the both of them. The little guy did not speak, only stared.

Guiltily, Jian Bianlin turned his head so that his gaze met the baby’s, for fear that making even one extra move would leave an unhealthy impact on the child’s young mind.

In the end, when Chu Jian turned over beneath him and carried on sleeping, he and the baby were still staring speechlessly at one another…

© 2013-2016 FANATICAL ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Translated with the express permission of the author for If you are not reading this from, then this translation has been posted without the permission of the translator.


When their baby was learning his numbers, he especially liked the number “8.”

There was one time when Chu Jian was away on business, and they were out of milk powder at home. Jian Bianlin had no choice but to drive the car out and bring along their son to the supermarket to buy some milk powder. After they had made the purchase and went back downstairs, he was still putting the item away into the car’s trunk when the baby darted off… to begin a lengthy expedition of looking for and recognizing numbers. Beginning with the car beside Jian Bianlin, the little guy found the “8” on the rear licence plate. With a giggle, he said to Jian Bianlin in his little baby’s voice, “Eight.”

The little darling had an extremely strong thirst for knowledge and also remarkable patience. With a few of his little steps, he pattered up behind the third car. Staring at it for a few seconds, he again found what he was looking for. “Eight.”

Jian Bianlin nodded. “That’s right. Eight.”

His son was gleeful at this. And then, next car…

That night, Jian Bianlin, his cap pulled further down than any other person’s, followed behind the entire way while constantly shielding his own face as well as his son’s. They went from vehicle to vehicle until they had checked out the large majority of all the rear licence plates in that underground parking garage. If, by chance, the vehicle owner was present and Jian Bianlin was recognized, he would even have to take photographs with the people and give out autographs, with the only request being that the other party did not photograph his son’s face…

Hence, without even knowing it, the little darling benefited the whole parking garage of people.

Voluntarily leading the way, he distributed his dear daddy’s autograph for an entire evening.

After they returned home and Jian Bianlin was talking on the phone with Chu Jian at their scheduled time, he was still sighing ruefully over this. “I think our baby’s stubbornness and patience… comes from me.”

© 2013-2016 FANATICAL ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Translated with the express permission of the author for If you are not reading this from, then this translation has been posted without the permission of the translator.


During the time when the baby was just starting to talk and still did not know many words yet, no matter what happened, he would always simply say, “Brokey.” The meanings of that word included, “don’t feel well,” “it’s shut off,” “it’s broken,” etc. So, on those set days when Jian Bianlin was in charge of watching the baby, from morning to evening, he would constantly be hearing, “Brokey.”

When Jian Bianlin shut off the television after finishing only half a program, the baby pointed at the pictureless television screen and said, “Brokey.” When he took the baby to get vaccinations, the little guy pointed at the back of his own hand where the needle had been inserted and said, “Brokey.” When Jian Bianlin finished washing his face and shut off the tap, the baby pointed at the faucet and said, “Brokey.” When the baby was fevering in the middle of the night, the little darling sobbingly point at his own head and cried, “Brokey” … Moreover, the little guy had extremely strong self-esteem, and each time after he said it once himself, he would make Jian Bianlin repeat it three times.

After one week of this had passed, there was one time when Jian Bianlin was discussing business matters with Xie Bin. While he was solemnly holding a pen, about to sign his name, he discovered that there was no ink left. His first reaction to this was, “Brokey.”

… Xie Bin gave a cough, not saying anything.

Sighingly, Jian Bianlin covered his face with both his hands, explaining in a low voice, “My son has been teaching me that lately.”

© 2013-2016 FANATICAL ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Translated with the express permission of the author for If you are not reading this from, then this translation has been posted without the permission of the translator.

Author’s Afterword — Do You Still Remember the Dreams of Our Youth?

The online instalments for My Darling began in October 2015 and came to a conclusion in January 2016, which just happened to be the three coldest months of the southern part of the country.

This is my first story about a boy and a girl whose friendship began in childhood.

When I was a kid, I had five or six good guy friends who grew up with me, and we had always had quite good  relationships. Anyone who has had a childhood guy friend will know that that sort of relationship is quite remarkable, similar to having another family member. We knew each other since we were three, four years old, that age when you still don’t really differentiate between boys and girls. Together we grew up, went to school, and also quarreled. Then when we were grown up, we dated people and broke up, and I watched them go off to study at military academy, which separated us into different parts of the country.

Many years later, when we saw each other again, it was “Whoa, how come he looks like that?” So remarkable.

As we gathered together, eating, drinking, and just having fun, it was just like when we were kids, and we showed not even an ounce of the sensibility and maturity that adults should have.

That’s why I have actually always wanted to write about this type of relationship, and also to do it as a form of commemoration. Quietly, without even being aware of it happening, we have all grown up, and quietly, without even being aware of things changing, we cannot return to what we once were. Many relationships have nothing to do with romantic love, but they are still worthy of being remembered. Feelings and relationships are not only about specific people; they also come about because of a specific period in time.

When that age has passed, all those things related to childhood friendships are also gone with the past.

© 2013-2016 FANATICAL ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Translated with the express permission of the author for If you are not reading this from, then this translation has been posted without the permission of the translator.

When I first started writing this story, I had lofty ideas and aims for it. I even told my BFF, “Humph, humph, humph, humph. I’m starting a cheesily dramatic and exciting story with lots of twists and turns using the movies and television industry as background. Since it has to do with stuff that’s part of my day-to-day work, when it’s written, it’s going to be awesome.”

In the beginning, I had thought that, because I understood the inner workings, it would be realistic, and realistic things are always the most interesting to read.

But in the end, I realized that I had overestimated myself. When it was time to begin writing, I suddenly did not want to bring in any complicated stuff into this. That is why you can see that in this story, aside from some small, trivial matters that skirt the edge of the movies and television industry, everything else does not involve it at all.

When you get to the bottom of it, I still just like things that are simple.

With this world, I understand what it is like, and I also know just how disappointing it sometimes can be to people. But those are not what I want to express. Ugly things are not worthy for me to, after completing my strenuous work for the day, still persist beneath my desk lamp, in front of my computer, working late into the night to write them out. As a screenwriter, I certainly understand what a powerful and effective weapon dramatic conflict can be. Yet as an author, I want, in the limited time that I have, to write about people and stories that I genuinely admire and like.

I have always said that it is my readers who have helped me to persevere in continuing to write, because during the times when I have wanted to set down my pen, they have always pulled me back. But each book that I write must be written for me. So long as I have begun the story and written its first word, then it most certainly is because I want to write it, that I love it. So in a certain sense, what I write is also a gift to myself, book by book, and all of them are my process of self-healing and restoration.

Thank you, J&C, for showing up in the winter of 2015 and, thereafter, forever existing.

© 2013-2016 FANATICAL ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Translated with the express permission of the author for If you are not reading this from, then this translation has been posted without the permission of the translator.

The line of lyrics at the conclusion of the main story is what I most wanted, when the story came to an end, to give to myself and to all of you:

Do you still remember the dreams of our youth? They are like a flower that shall never wither.

There have been bumps, and there have been setbacks. Who hasn’t fallen into the mire before? But still, to the day I die, I will reach for the sun, as well as the dreams of my youth.

© 2013-2016 FANATICAL ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Translated with the express permission of the author for If you are not reading this from, then this translation has been posted without the permission of the translator.

Additional Comments:

So, another translation has come to an end. 🙂 I’m still on vacation and though I have VPN that allows me to access the blog, doing anything on it takes forever. Still, I could not end this translation project without saying a few words.

My introduction post for this novel gave you my recollection of my initial impression of this story. Since then, I’ve re-read it several times. What does this novel do to me? Hmm… kind of like how the cast and crew of Jian Bianlin’s filming project felt when they were told that Chu Jian and Jian Bianlin were one another’s first love. “What does one’s first love represent? It is not simply ‘love;’ it also embodies ‘youth.'” (chapter 8.1) I giggled quietly when some of you were wondering why Chu Jian didn’t want to tell their parents about their “new” relationship. Yes, why? Just like, why did my then-boyfriend, now-hubby and I initially keep our relationship quiet from friends and family for nearly a month before a group of our mutual friends ran into us holding hands (and we literally threw off each other’s hand and pretended we didn’t know one another)? In that first relationship, why do you feel shy, not knowing how you should let people know about this person in your life, wanting to both shout it from the mountaintops and also keep the relationship your sweet, little secret. There’s something innocent and special about first love—that heart-racing feeling whenever you see the person, the shyness, the uncertainty about what you should do but no matter what you do, you still feel so sweet it’s like you drank a bottle of honey. Perhaps because that relationship is very pure.

When I followed along with the development of Chu Jian and Jian Bianlin’s relationship, I was transported back to those days when I first started dating my hubby, and I found so many similarities to our leads. The author truly captured those feelings, and so the “magic” of this novel to me is how well the joy of that first relationship is brought out from the words that she wrote.  (Technically, like Chu Jian, I had dated someone—my childhood guy friend, in fact—for a few days before breaking up and dating my hubby a couple of years later, but also like Chu Jian, I don’t consider that guy my first love. LOL. Hubby deserves that title.)

Xie Bin said, “…most people’s first love is usually like a novel of the pains of youth” (chapter 7.5) because most first loves eventually come to an end. But when your first love blossoms into a love that lasts for a lifetime, that is something that’s pretty darn special. Chu Jian and Jian Bianlin are pretty darn blessed, and the long wait that led up to it becomes worth it.

So, if you have a novel of the pains of youth, perhaps in this My Darling universe, J&C were able to give you a happy ending, but regardless, whatever novel you “write” in your life, I wish you the happiest of endings. If you haven’t started your novel yet, maybe this will give you a little hope. And if your novel ends like theirs, I’m happy for you that you’ve found something so special. ❤


I have always found that there is something about this author—be it the values or views on life that shine through in her writing or the little glimpses that I get of her through certain things, like this afterword—that resonates with me.

“I have always said that it is my readers who have helped me to persevere in continuing to write, because during the times when I have wanted to set down my pen, they have always pulled me back. But each book that I write must be written for me. So long as I have begun the story and written its first word, then it most certainly is because I want to write it, that I love it.”

If you take the word “write” in the above paragraph and replace it with “translate,” these are like the words of my heart and why I have been translating these last few years.

To all of you, whether you have been reading along with me since Really, Really Miss You, came in just with this translation of My Darling, or found this blog anywhere in between, I am very grateful to you, all of my readers. My husband wonders why I do this—I earn no money, I stay up into the wee hours of the night, I forgo the time I could have used for other hobbies. The reasons I keep picking up yet another project, even with my ever decreasing spare time due to, mainly, kids who are growing up, are (1) I truly want to share this author’s work with more people, and (2) I read your comments and you tell me that the translations brightened your day, or encouraged you to reflect on something, or just brought some fun. I like discussing characters (can you tell? LOL) and hearing people’s thoughts on the stories that I love as well as sharing my own thoughts. So thank you to all of you.

However, each individual project that I take on comes from somewhere within me. I have a love for each novel that I have translated, whether it is because I have been captivated by the story, touched by the characters, enthralled by the atmosphere and language, sent into girly giggles and happiness that I just had to share, or spurred on to reflect on my views on life. So in this way, each translation is also for me, and that is what motivates me to make it to the end of every one.

Time is something that most of us wish we had more of, and I am no exception. When I started this project, I didn’t realize how crazily busy this period in time would be for me, and to be honest, I’m a little pooped. So, I’m going to take a little break from taking on a project myself. I’m not exactly sure how long it will be, maybe a month, maybe several months. But I promise to be back, because you are all here (I hope! You will be, right?) and I still have several novels in mind that I “need” to do. In fact, I have already received the author’s approval for the next translation, so when I’m ready, I’ll come back with an announcement and a start date. For now, you might see me around occasionally helping my also-very-busy friend, Peanuts, with Don’t Be So Proud.

In the meantime, take care.




1 of 1 Prologue
36 of 36 Chapter segments
1 of 1 Epilogue



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213 thoughts on “My Darling (我的曼达林) — Epilogue and Author’s Afterword *NOVEL COMPLETED*

  1. Thank you for your hard work! Another great novel by Mo Bao Fei Bao!!!

    Honestly I was really annoyed with Chu Jian in the very beginning of the novel and really pity Jian Bailin. But as I kept reading and come to a better understand about the both of them. I came to understand why Chu Jian is the way she is and why Jian Bailin is the way he is. It was nice to follow along their cute love story and how they end up together at the end. I also like how during the novel it would also include snip-it of their childhood too.

  2. Thank you for sharing Mo Bao Fei Bao’s books! Your work introduced me to the wonderful world of romance C-Novels.

    I started with Honey Stewed Squid and then I keep coming back. MBFB’s works are so addicting. 🙂

  3. I’ve read all the translated MFBF except for Life: Black and White Film and this is one of my favorites, if not my top favorite (a close second maybe to Together Forever, just because this is the only novel that made me cry!).

    Thank you!

  4. This novel was simply put…amazing.

    A lot of the times, reading translated novels doesn’t really move me. But there was something about the way that this particular novel was written and the way you translated it that really moved me. Your additional comments that provided your take on the characters was also great. I just wholly loved it. This novel made me really wistful of my childhood despite still being a teen. Like Jian Bianlin, I have a hard time expressing my feelings so I can’t express just how much this novel and your translation made me feel. But you did a great job and I’m extremely happy that a translator as dedicated as you translated this novel. So thank you.

    Thank you very much

    • ❤ I am so glad that this novel touched you. It’s funny how it is about two adults and explores some more emotions, but it also has a wistful innocent feel.

      Thank you for reading.

  5. My first love is my forever too, after a one week boyfriend that doesn’t count. The translations you make, and the stories Mo Bao Fei Bao writes are always beautiful and heart touching. Thank you so much for bring ing these to us, and for those like myself who cannot tell the author, please, tell how much we love them.

  6. Thank you for taking the time to translate and share this lovely novel. I am Chinese by descent but barely know how to read or write Chinese as I grew up outside of China. Reading these novels, give me a glimpse of life and culture in China and help me appreciate Chinese culture even more. Thank you for being so inspiring at what you do. Wishing you many blessings this Chinese New Year

  7. Aaaaaaaa I’ve been reading all MBFB works you translated here Hoju, thank you so much!!!!!
    and I can’t not leave any comment, now that after marathoning her works I found Cantonese sounds sexy asdfghjkl I blame Yi Wenze and Jian Bianlin guilty! ;w;

  8. Thank you for translating this oh so sweet story … fortunately in our case I wasn’t blind (at least in high school… he says he’d already noticed me in junior high) my high school sweetheart “hubby” & I are celebrating 29 yrs married, 37 years together this month : )

  9. Thank you so much MBFB for this sweet story, and Hoju, for the translation of and for introducing MBFB’s novels. Really, really love all of those I’ve read so far! 😍😘

  10. I absolutely love this. Because of the translator’s note in the intro i wasn’t expecting a fluffy romantic story but i was surprised. Did they even say I love you to each other in the whole story? There are many ways of saying and expressing how much you love somebody but it’s very remarkable for me that they didn’t implicitly said the word love out loud. Everything was expressed through our MC and MLs actions. Thank you so much Hoju and MBFB for sharing this work. I’m really glad i’ve encountered this site. 💖💖💖💖💖

  11. Wow, a very touching story.
    Thanks for the all hard work.

  12. Hello Hoju,

    The reason I am writing such a long message in a stroy that had been posted by you long ago is mainly because I did not have a chance to send a personal message and I did not know how to. I am a reader all the way from Sri Lanka (a tiny island beneath India) and have been reading many Chinese/Japanese and Korean translations from Novel Updates. I accidentally came upon your blog like a month ago and have been reading ever since. Actually it was during the pandemic quarantine period I stumbled upon it. First of all I want to thank you for the amazing job you’ve been doing. Reading your comments I see that you are a very busy person and yet you take time to translate these and leave it free for us. What I love the most is how you respect the author and take permission before you translate. Your translates are really well done and compare to other translations I have read I have a high preference for yours (I have yet to read peanuts translations) Second of all I got to admit that because of you I have become a huge fan of MBFB. I have read four of her books nonstop now. I am completely in love with her novels. Thirdly I honestly want to start learning the language after reading your translations. Why you may ask I have this random thought but it is also due to you. The manner you have translated everything and how you put even the smallest thing in here ad how they all interconnect with such a beautiful language made me want to learn it.

    Finally I want to say quite selfishly, I really hope you continue doing this amazing job you’re doing. I have honestly, in the simplest words, have fallen in love with this blog. I have been even mentioning your names in reviews that I do (I hope it is ok with you) which I normally do not because I have started an admiration for your blog. Even though you would never know me I would like to tell that as an avid reader I would truly be ready to help you with anything I can help with anytime.

    PS- Sorry for any mistakes. English is actually my third language although in a way I can say it is the second best language I speak after my mother tongue.

    Much love,
    Devoted fan ❤

  13. Thank you so much for your time and effort 💛 Even though I’m not really commenting on each chapter, I still read this book not a word less. As long as you are happy with it I hope you will still translate the book, same goes with the author. As long as you have that thing to keeps you going with writing and translating, then do it. Have a nice day and blessings for the two of you!

  14. Honestly, I can never get tired of re-reading MBFB’s works, all her stories are well engraved in my memories… this time while reading My Darling, I ended up crying in nostalgia as all my high school years came back to my mind, the time when I first got introduced to her works. I’m sorry I didn’t usually comment back …but I sincerely want to thank Hoju for bringing these stories to me and many, crossing the language barrier yet preserving it’s beauty and purity. ^^

  15. Thank you so much for translating this book!!

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