Turning Back Time (若只如初见) – Chapter 1

March 15, 2015 by cloudandsea 41 Comments

Peanuts: Welcome cloudandsea, our new translator aboard. Although she’ll only be translating a short story, if the response is good, she may end up translating a longer novel later so you know what to do la 😛 She is well-known in SSB for her fondness for male leads with disabilities, such a compassionate girl 🙂

Hi girls! I have been lurking around in SSB for quite a long time but because I am really inactive, so you don’t really see me around. 😛 So… hi everybody! Turning Back Time (若只如初见) is a novel by Fei Bao (靡宝) that I really enjoy reading and I really want to share and spread the love for this amazing novel. This author is not Mo Bao Fei Bao although it seems like they have the same name. There was one point that I thought authors that has the name Fei Bao in it can really write well. Despite it being a very short story, it has left a very deep impression on me and my heart aches reading it even for the third time. When I read it for the first time, I forgot to bookmark it so I went to baidu the keywords that I can remember of this novel and finally manage to find it after hours of trying. 😛

Fei Bao uses really simple sentence structure in writing this novel but she still manages to evoke the feelings and emotions of our female lead well (Dan Xin). Dan Xin is the main lead of this story and will be the person narrating as we see how her relationship with her husband has come to the stage of separation. She is a strong and decisive female character that I respect and adore. Hopefully you will enjoy this translation the same as me and so… let’s start the journey!

 

Chapter One

Mom shouted loudly through the phone: “What? Separating? Why?”

I frowned. My ears hurt and I took the phone further away from me.

A divorce revolves around the two parties. It is a marriage between them but yet it is  others who constantly ask for the reason behind their divorce.

“Mom, we have signed the papers today. Your objection is overruled.” I replied.

Mom prompted further, “Who initiated the divorce?”

I replied, “It’s me. I like someone else.”

Mom did not believe what I have said, “You are my daughter. I know what kind of person you are!”

I chuckled at her words because I did not even know what kind of person I was. “Mom, you do not have to worry. There are many couples divorcing these days. We are just one of them.”

Mom retorted, “But in this world, there are countless of couples who spend the rest of their lives together. Why are you not one of them?”

I replied to Mom out of the corner of my strained smile, “We didn’t manage to master that skill well enough.”

Mom sighed, “Dan Xin, Dan Xin[1]… We didn’t name you well. You always make me worry.”

Tears welled up in my eyes. Only Mom would unconditionally love me this way.

I said, “Mom, I’m fine. I’m still young and will still have a chance to find a good man.”

“Both of you have been together well and all… Why separating suddenly… The house and the car…” Mom mumbled, repeating the same sentences again and again.

When I hung up the phone, she was still shouting my name at the other end of the line.

There was a moment of complete silence. I was really tired and exhausted. The house was empty with only me and my cat. I looked around the luxuriously decorated master bedroom and saw the photo of us hanging on the wall. It was taken during our trip to Jiuzhaigou. At that time, his charm was accompanied with a touch of immaturity. At that time, I was completely in love with him.

I stood up on the sofa, took the photo off the wall and threw it into a corner of the sofa.

---

When I mentioned the divorce, he was sitting on this sofa.

“Cheng Rui, I want to get a divorce.”

It was as if I was telling him nothing special.

“Cheng Rui, I am going to buy food from the street.”

“Cheng Rui, I am going back to visit my parents.”

He was reading his music scores. This year, his career reached a peak along with his record-breaking album sales. His news and posters were all over the place. They called him the Siren – the mythical creature who lured nearby sailors with his enchanting voice.

My ever-dashing husband who entered into countless number of girls’ wet dream ultimately had to walk out my life – no matter how unwilling he was.

He heard my words and raised his head, looking a little shocked. No matter how much time has passed, his mesmerising eyes never fade away with time. He stared deeply into my eyes and looked at me in silence for a long time. He looked at me for so long that I considered whether to repeat my words until I heard him mumbled, “We have still come to this stage…”

I assumed he agreed. To be able to divorce in this way is the dream of many couples. In the shortest possible time, using the simplest language and the most peaceful way, we agreed on our divorce. People come and go in your life. No one in this world can accompany you forever.

---

The telephone rang again. This time, I guessed that Mom must have asked our relatives to ring and check on me.

But it was Cheng Rui this time. “You haven’t sleep yet?” he asked.

I looked at the clock; it was only 9 pm. I laughed and replied, “I am waiting for the clock to strike 12!”

He was silent for a while before telling me that he wanted to collect some stuff.

“No problem,” I replied.

This house was bought by him and he gave it to me when we separated. I was the one who initiated the divorce but he was the one who settled everything. He was very responsible and generous – giving the house, car, jewellery and even the flower pot in the study room to me.

The flower pot was my wedding anniversary gift to him. I gave him a flower pot and he gave me a diamond ring. A diamond lasts forever but a flower only blossoms for one season. Come to think about it, I actually gained.

I put down the phone and then pulled out the phone line to prevent any more ‘concerned’ relatives from calling. When we first got married, everybody questioned why would a degree-holder like me marry a busker. Why would I give up on myself like that? Was it because I was pregnant with his child? My father was so furious he gave me a tight slap. My mother did not speak to me for a long time.

But I still went ahead to marry him. I was young at that time and had all the courage and energy in the world. My heart was still untarnished then. Love was bigger than the sky and I had him.

Cheng Rui used to have the habit of telling me that he will treat me well. Upon hearing that, I would hug him tightly. Those were the days…

Fortunately, my mother was angry because I did not inform her about the divorce and not because it was a disgrace to the family. She was afraid I would get hurt. But it was inevitable that I would feel hurt.

There are no adults who grew up without any emotional scars. It is just that we know how to cover it well.

 

 

[1] Her name, Dan Xin (丹心), is the homophone for ‘worry’ (担心)